simpleRECURSION || Ten Signs You Might Be an English Teacher

March 13, 2008

Ten Signs You Might Be an English Teacher

10:37 PM

10. Your DS has become a glorified alarm clock.
9. You wake up with the realization you just tried to teach English to someone...in a dream.
8. You can come to blows with a co-worker over grammatical usage.
7. You know what the present perfect progressive is, but you have no idea that nuclear war has wiped out all civilisation outside of your subterranean office.
6. You come to the conclusion that the guy from your dream should probably brush up on his verb tenses.
5. You know who Betty Azar is, you can administer the TOEFL, and you can explain how to pronounce B, P, and V and L and R differently.
4. You realise in horror how greatly colloquial English language has changed since you were in grade school and that almost all common slang is derived from erroneous grammatical constructions.
3. You carry a few red pens in your pocket and use them every chance you get, on just about everything.
2. Suppressing sexual and homicidal urges is now a part of professional courtesy.
1. You teach your students to proofread your work and forget to blog.

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Comments

i've just gone through two years of your entries. :P its astonishing to see how much i missed.

anyways i was culling through my comments for poems. i'm planning on joining a contest - which involves a lot of poems. and while i have a lot, i dont like many of them. :P

so yeah. :) wish me luck. im off to contest devirginize myself.

Posted by MLP on March 14, 2008 6:43 PM

It's nice to see that someone's reading all this stuff. ;)

A contest? Can I play? I haven't written anything worthwhile in a long time...

Well, I wish you the best of luck, sweetie. May the pop of your contest cherry be heard around the world!

Posted by Mike on March 15, 2008 10:05 PM

One sign you might be CHESS teacher:
(back from the days when I did teach chess 10 hours a day sometimes)
1. You wake up, wondering how you should begin your day - with king's pawn move, or queen's pawn move. Yeah, being still asleep you confused your day with a chess game...

Roman

Posted by Roman on March 15, 2008 11:56 PM

AHAHAHAHA! I hear you, buddy! ;)

Posted by Mike on March 16, 2008 2:12 PM

One Sign That You Might Be Working Too Hard (or Play Way Too Many Computer Games):
http://www.inktank.com/AT/index.cfm?nav=201

Posted by Dave on March 17, 2008 1:05 PM

Thanks, heh. ;)

Posted by Mike on March 18, 2008 9:50 PM

Well, that confirms it: I'm not an English teacher!

Posted by R on April 21, 2008 2:57 PM

AHAHAHA! Well spoken, sir! ;)

Posted by Mike on April 21, 2008 11:06 PM